In what may be the most ironic product names of all time hello kitty from Sanrio is selling a vibrating massager on it’s online store. It was being marketed as a “shoulder massager” but just take a look at it…
It all started back in 1997 when Sanrio gave a license to Genyo Co. to make a number of different Hello Kitty products. They produced all different types of products and one that was approved was a Hello Kitty shoulder massager. This was sent out to gift shops, restaurant chains, and other knick-knack stores and was truly sold as a shoulder massager around Japan initially.
It wasn’t long, however, that some people decided to use the shoulder massagers to massage other areas besides their shoulders. The Hello Kitty shoulder massagers that were being sold at the store down the street began to show up in adult movies. Soon they were also being sold in video shops and the sales of the product skyrocketed. Eventually it made its way online to be sold internationally as a “must have” toy.
When Sanrio found out that the shoulder massager was being sold as a sex toy, they claimed to be disgusted, especially since the Sanrio name and Hello Kitty character were on it. They immediately contacted Genyo Co. and asked them to stop. The Hello Kitty toy had at this point gained cult status and was selling like hotcakes and Genyo Co. had no intention of letting a hugely profitable product be taken off the shelf just because people were using it to stimulate other parts than intended. Sanrio tried to revoke Genyo’s licensing rights, but Genyo refused saying they had a valid license that had been approved and had spent much money developing the product.
Since Sanrio was supposedly so disgusted and enraged by this “shoulder massager,” but the company’s online store has begun reselling the item for $10 (1260 yen) in the Sanrio Japanese online store (in Japanese):
True the planet will probably be better off without your carbon footprint, belching and farting methane, driving a car, and breathing - but what about your coffin. Don’t make your final act be as environmentally counterproductive as the rest of your infestation/life on this planet.
This tasteful recycled paper coffin screams flower toting tree hugger, as you are being lowered into mother earth.
Ashes to ashes dust to Ecocoffins - but the humiliation of having bugs laugh at you while they eat your rotting corpse is too much for some.
These tasteful coffin covers make it look like you went out and bought a real coffin, but without the eco or financial cost. Kinda like eating with a girl and pretending to tip but taking it back as you walk out - economical and keeps up appearances.
You might want to skip that viking funeral/afterlife barbeque - all the smoke is a major environmental fau paux.
You might want to skip that viking funeral/afterlife barbeque - all the smoke is a major environmental fau paux.
Susanne Wiigh-Mäsak takes bodies within a few days and freezes them in liquid nitrogen. This makes the body very brittle. The body is then slightly vibrated which turns the body into a powder. A vacuum chamber is then used to evaporate away any water so that the powder is dry. The powder is then placed in a small corn or potato starch coffin and is buried to decompose within a few months. This reduces the environmental impact on water, air and soil compared to a normal burial or cremation.
It seems to me it would be more eco-friendly to just start leaving people dead wherever they fall or maybe just move them to the garden or compost heap in the yard, or just feeding you to stray dogs. We could make Soylent Green pet food!
Soylent Green - 70s movie and famous book where the starving planet started eating people - kinda like Hollywood, only better for the environment.
I have no inclination to buy an iphone, nothing against macs but if I wanted to stare at something covered in smudges I would start fingering my monitor. This guy took his iPhone re-painted all of the apple logos for some unknown reason.
The original iPhone
Partially naked iPhone
Now fully exposed
Freshly painted original apple logo - the rainbow trademark has been officially trademarked by an alternative lifestyle. Even the leprechauns had to switch teams.
Apple’s original attempt at a portable device - the Newton (nearly bankrupted the company).
It does look more colorful with the old style logo, and for some reason all of the ring tones switched to show tunes though.
The finished product, complete with appropriately colorful background.
Some moron has decided into park in one of our spots and we are way too immature to let this go without wildly inappropriate overreaction. Parking directly behind the parktard didn’t seem to do the trick so we decided to get the city involved, or at least by proxy.
Goofball taking up my spot.
First overreaction - park directly behind said moron and make it so he can’t leave until well after dark.
Inspiration strikes - why not let the city reserve my parking.
Can’t be a felony - this thing couldn’t cost that much money, and technically I am just moving it. So third strike is still in reserve for something more fun down the line.
There now we can drive off before any more witnesses observe our latest office prank, would have gone faster if someone hadn’t locked the hatch.
Always good to involve accomplices so you can blame whatever happens on the group and you would have never done anything this dumb on my own.
Easy setup and my new reserved parking is now in place.
I’m going to retire. I never thought this day would come, but I won a lottery! I know that soon all of my family and friends and friends of friends will start talking to me again and acknowledge that I’m alive (I miss you mommy!) because of my new found wealth. Though I haven’t found out how to collect yet.
I received an email last night telling me that I won some lottery I never entered. Worse is that I never heard of it. One more worse than that, the email did not come from a “Microsoft.com” address but a “Hotmail.com” address.
Once I took off my retard helmet and put on my propeller beanie hat and geeked out, I checked out the Internet Headers (posted below) I noticed that the retards that spammed used Squirrel Mail from a domain hosting company (http://www.dwhs.net/) which either means the spammer uses their system as a customer or hacked into their system. The domain “rapnewsonline.net” which was used as the Squirrel Mail authenticated username is currently not registered, so if you are interested just head over to GoDaddy (<–shameless referral) and pick it up!
When you decide that you want to investigate your own spam, there are a few easy steps to check out who is filling up your chest-squishy download time with annoying emails, you can view the Internet Headers of the email and find the IP address of the sender and potentially more useful information like the originating domain.
Search for IP address information here: http://www.arin.net/ (in the upper right you put the IP address and click the “Seach WHOIS” button).
If you want to pay some money, you can investigate a lot about the domain listed, if there is one, but signing up for some service that keeps track of lots of information and can give you a geeksfull of it: http://www.dnsstuff.com/
One favor I ask is that if you are able to attain the lottery winnings, float me a couple bucks (I’m a bit short until payday, after that point I will still be short but I’ll have money).
Internet Headers:
Received: from dwhs140.dwhs.net (localhost [127.0.0.1])
by shortbus.retardzone.com with ESMTP id 0ADCB37BBA
for michael@retardzone(dot)com; Thu, 19 Oct 2007 10:43:51 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from dwhs140.dwhs.net (dwhs140.dwhs.net [66.249.137.140]) by shortbus.retardzone.com with ESMTP id eE5qwDGCB3CGxdaG for michael@retardzone(dot)com; Thu, 18 Oct 2007 10:43:51 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from infoline by dwhs140.dwhs.net with local (Exim 4.68)
(envelope-from <sharondave2007@hotmail.com>)
id 1IiYVf-0003ka-5O; Thu, 18 Oct 2007 12:46:11 -0400
Received: from 77.220.7.19 ([77.220.7.19])
(SquirrelMail authenticated user ekomen@rapnewsonline.net)
by dwhs140.dwhs.net with HTTP;
Thu, 18 Oct 2007 12:46:11 -0400 (EDT)
Message-ID: <12438.77.220.7.19.1192725971.squirrel@dwhs140.dwhs.net>
Date: Thu, 18 Oct 2007 12:46:11 -0400 (EDT)
Subject: YOUR EMAIL ID HAS WON THE 2007 UK MICROSOFT LOTTERY
From: “UK MICROSOFT LOTTERY” <sharondave2007@hotmail.com>
Reply-To: sharon_dave9@hotmail.com
User-Agent: SquirrelMail/1.4.9a
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain;charset=iso-8859-1
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit
Importance: Normal
Return-Path: sharondave2007@hotmail.com
Message:
UK MICROSOFT JACKPOT LOTTERY
REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L
BATCH: 4583JL/WIN
Finally, today, we announce to you the results of the MICROSOFT MEGA JACKPOT LOTTERY EMAIL DRAWS held on october 17th, 2007. Your e-mail address, attached to winning number 11-48-26-34-44-34,With serial number (647489), consequently won in the Tenth category.Since the draw was conducted through zonal batching of the emails sampled,and the globe was divided into zones. You are hereby notified that your winning falls under Europe Zone, and hence you are to be paid by our European Payment Centre.
The Selection process was carried out through random sampling in our computerized email selection machine (TOPAZ) from a database of over 1,000,000 email addresses drawn from all the continents of the world
You have been approved for lump sums pay out of £850,000,000 British Pounds Sterling Credited to File REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L and winning number {11 48 26 34 44 34}
Your fund has been insured with your REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L and winning
number(11 48 26 34 44 34).
To File for your winning prize, contact the Claims Payment Officer below by email for remittance of your prize to you.
MICROSOFT CLAIMS DEPARTMENT FUDICIARY AGENT.
Handling Officer: Mr.Donald Scofield
Email: donald_scofieldclaimsagent@yahoo.com.hk
Contact Phone Number:+44 703 184 4124
NOTE THAT YOU ARE TO INCLUDE ALL THE DATA BELOW WHEN CONTACTING THE PAYMENT AGENT:
1.FullName:…………………………..
2.Address:……………………………
3.Nationality:………………………..
4.Sex:……………………………….
5.Age:……..Date of Birth…………….
6.Occupation:…………………………
7.Home Tel:. Mobile Tel:……….Fax:…
8.State of Origin:………Country:……..
9Your File Ref No: ……………………
Dr.Sharon David
Online Co-ordinator
LOTTERY SPONSOR Microsoft
Corporation U.K.
It’s a well known fact that if it weren’t for spam, half of the work day would be available for things like goofing around at work, millions of people would go home to only see empty personal email inboxes, the Internet would run quicker and people would get bored sooner. Here’s another spam depository, I call it MySpace.
Myspace.com has become of the success stories that people read about in Web 2.0 magazines and can actually envision themselves accomplishing (good luck you goofballs). Of course, for every success story there are tens of thousands of Retard Zone sites (oh ya, “welcome to Retard Zone!”).Â
Of course, whenever there is any success story, there are more people willing to use that success as a stepping stone and in this case, spam people. Alright, so Retard Zone doesn’t have a MySpace account, but I do personally. My account is so lame that the unicorns and rainbows on my page would really demean the most efeminite men.
I made a change in the MySpace spam settings on my account out of curiousity as to how much spam I would receive. In this case, spam is considered “MySpace Friend Request”, and the total someone can get is quite amazing. I’m pretty sure that Tom isn’t the most liked person in the world, he just accepts every new member which means he gets something like a 400:1 ratio of invalid accounts to valid ones. I received over 180 email requests in less than three days and MySpace page actually only has like 2 people and Tom is trying to get away from me.
Below you will see the settings that I currently use, which helps to reduce the spam traffic that gets generated when anyone new creates a MySpace account and wants to add you as a friend. The purpose of adding you as a friend? Because when you go to their MySpace page you are confronted with choices of either viewing their web cam show, earning money working from home, filling out surveys, or joining another site (American Singles anyone?).
In what may be the most ironic product names of all time hello kitty from Sanrio is selling a vibrating massager on it’s online store. It was being marketed as a “shoulder massager” but just take a look at it…
Filed under: 
Once I took off my retard helmet and put on my propeller beanie hat and geeked out, I checked out the Internet Headers (posted below) I noticed that the retards that spammed used Squirrel Mail from a domain hosting company (
